This is Alpha, the first-born, when he was 2YO.
This is Beta, the second-born, when he was about 2YO.
This is Gamma, the third-born, when he was about 18MO.
13 Things Your Runner Won’t Tell You
Feb
12
2013
Reader’s Digest has a popular feature where they find some sources from a particular industry and gets tips and insider secrets from them. I think the point is so that you’ll know better how to deal with the system if you need their services. Examples are “13 Things Your Dentist Won’t Tell You” or “13 Things Your Flight Attendant Won’t Tell You” or “13 Things Your Pharmacist Won’t Tell You”.
They seem to have covered all the major industries, so I am going to cover one I doubt they will get: the friendly neighborhood runner. Yes, “runner” as in “person who runs”. Distance runner, as I don’t know how many of these will apply to sprinters.
- There is no runner’s high.
- I don’t know what endorphins are.
- I run only because I have no athletic skills or talent for any other sport.
- Actually, that’s not true. I run so that I can eat more chocolate.
- Don’t get too close to me while I’m running – I might blow my nose or spit on you.
- Don’t follow me if I take a sudden detour into the woods – I’m making my own port-a-potty.
- No, I didn’t quite get the time I wanted in that race. But I’ll always have a good reason why.
- I’m not really stretching – I’m just tired and don’t want you to know.
- I’m not runing on the sidewalk because it ends soon and I don’t want to run through the puddle/tall grass/other hazard that’s there.
- I can’t see you through your windshield. I wave at most cars, just in case you are waving at me.
- Even though I might not see you, just wave if you want to be friendly. I’ve had people slow their cars and ask questions or try to chat. Not only is that awkward, but it messes up my breathing rhythm and my pace.
- I would rather you moved over than slowed down while driving by me. Both would be nice, but it’s easier for me to tell when you’ve moved over than slowed. I like to know that you have seen me.
- I don’t care how friendly your dog is – I don’t want it following me or running along with me.
And no, these aren’t all mine – some of them are based on my observations of other runners.
What do you know that we do not know?
What do you understand that we do not?
Job 15:9
This little article thingy was written by Some Guy sometime around 6:48 am and has been carefully placed in the Sports category.
February 12th, 2013 at 7:44 am
#14 – I sometimes forget I have hands, and so they flop around funny-style.
February 12th, 2013 at 11:35 am
I don’t want to waste energy by spending it controlling my hands. Hands don’t help propel me.
February 13th, 2013 at 9:57 pm
I agree with number four and I promise to never follow you! Contemplating the Detroit marathon in October. Keyword is contemplating. R u still running in winter?
February 14th, 2013 at 9:12 am
I ran once this winter – when it got to 60 degrees. I’ll start running in a week or two. After all the chocolate has settled.
February 26th, 2013 at 2:02 pm
#15 – Do not feel the need to wave back if you are driving and have a cell phone in hand. Please keep a hand on the wheel.
#16 – Don’t run too closely behind me. Sometimes I have “turbo boosts” that others don’t enjoy as much as I do.