This is Alpha, the first-born, when he was 2YO.
This is Beta, the second-born, when he was about 2YO.
This is Gamma, the third-born, when he was about 18MO.
SCL Old Guest Post – Swearing Substitutions
Sep
22
2021
Here is a guest post I wrote for SCL back in the day (2011 in case you’re wondering). I think it wasn’t run because he had something similar. I can’t check though, because the SCL site is broken for anything not on the front page.
I am on the conservative side of things when it comes to swearing. If you’re anything like I am, you refer to the martial arts actor as “Jean-Clause Van Darn” just so there is no possibility of confusion.
My upbringing may have something to do with my stance on language. After all, I’ve heard my father swear only once in my life.
It was at Christmastime, of all things. Dad had just finished setting up the tree and we were about to start decorating it.
However, the tree was not quite level and it started leaning. Dad spent several minutes adjusting and re-adjusting the tree so that it would stand straight. Finally, he had the tree where he wanted it and he stood back to make sure it looked right.
… at which point the tree started falling, which was not what my father wanted to happen As it was crashing, my dad voiced his now-famous exclamation:
“Moses!”
The Ten Commandments state that thou shall not take the name of the Lord thy God in vain.
The Ten Commandments do not state that thou shall not take the names of other Biblical characters in vain. I think that makes them fair game.
SCL has already touched on the point of swearing occasionally, but not the various lengths that people go to in order to sound like they’re swearing but without crossing the line.
And where exactly is that line?
Here are a few places it could be:
Based on the FCC
The infamous list of words that can’t be broadcast in the USA is a good place to start. But what about Christians in other countries? Or those who don’t speak English? The FCC doesn’t apply to them, but I bet most every culture has some taboo or extra-rude words that would be the equivalent. I think the Smurfs were the first to creatively get around the FCC by substituting the word “Smurf” for any stronger language.
Anything other than God’s name
The third commandment is an obvious line in the sand. I’ve known some people who use common epithets that usually involve God’s name, but they replace God’s name with the name of a “deity” from another religion. It’s amusing, but it got me wondering if that people could be considered to be praying to a false god, which would violate the first commandment.
Line? What line?
Some people think lines are legalistic and shun them. But if everyone thought that way, then SCL would have lasted about 3 days. SCL needs lines.
Normally at the end of a blog post, there’s a question to garner comments and responses. The first questions that came to mind for this post were “What are your swearing substitutions?” and “What are some of the crazier phrases you’ve heard?”
But then I started thinking about what kind of comments that would get, and I started to worry. So I’m not asking any official question here. Just write whatever comment you feel like writing, related to the topic of swearing substitutions.
But remember that Jon’s grandmother will be reading your comment.
And that’s the guest post I sent over to Jon Acuff about a decade ago. I hope someone gets that old site working, so we can peruse the treasures within.
You shall not take the name of the Lord your God in vain, for the Lord will not [f]leave him unpunished who takes His name in vain.
Exodus 20:7
This little article thingy was written by Some Guy sometime around 9:00 pm and has been carefully placed in the Humor category.
September 23rd, 2021 at 4:44 pm
I won’t have an opinion until I am able to read John McWhorter’s book: Nine Nasty Words: English in the Gutter: Then, Now, and Forever. Our library doesn’t have it. I usually adopt whatever his view is when it comes to language.