This is Alpha, the first-born, when he was 2YO.
This is Beta, the second-born, when he was about 2YO.
This is Gamma, the third-born, when he was about 18MO.
Capitalism
Sep
24
2013
Wait, why are you talking about economics and money and politics now? We were just discussing the new style guide…
See with what large letters I am writing to you with my own hand.
Galatians 6:11
Archive for the ‘Humor’ Category
Rough Neighborhood
Aug
29
2013
Transcript:
Flashing police lights seen in a rearview mirror
Driver: Let’s hear what the nice police officer has to tell us
Police: You, in the Buick, pull over!
Driver: No!
Police: No?! I wasn’t asking. I said pull over!
Driver: No!
Mr. Rogers: It’s a cardigan.
If you ever take your neighbor’s cloak as a pledge, you are to return it to him before the sun sets
Exodus 22:26
Doris
May
30
2013
A day of wrath is that day,
A day of trouble and distress,
A day of destruction and desolation,
A day of darkness and gloom,
A day of clouds and thick darkness,
Zephaniah 1:15
You’re Mocking Me, Aren’t You?
Apr
4
2013
I will also laugh at your calamity;
I will mock when your dread comes,
Proverbs 1:26
Burn Kit
Mar
28
2013
I haven’t had much training in emergency medical situations, but I did have something back in high school health class. And various bits and pieces of knowledge that I picked up over the years, especially being a parent.
The one piece of advice I remember about burns is this:
Do not put butter on burns!
All my knowledge about what to do with burns consists of that – do not put butter on them. I have no idea what I am supposed to put on burns – I know only what NOT to put on them.
In order to help those of you who have the same problem as I do, I have decided to put together burn kits that you can keep in your house or car or wherever you think you might need them. That way, you won’t have to think about what you are supposed to put on burns – it will be right there for you.
Here is my first prototype:
Like I said, put something that’s not butter on burns, right?
But if the bright spot remains in its place and has not spread in the skin, but is dim, it is the swelling from the burn; and the priest shall pronounce him clean, for it is only the scar of the burn.
Leviticus 13:28
Worst Piñata Ever
Mar
21
2013
This post was inspired by a radio commercial. I forget which company it was or what they were trying to sell. It said something along the lines of “hitting a hornet’s nest like a piñata”.
Now available on T-shirts! Go buy some Worst Piñata Ever merchandise on Printfection.
Moreover, the Lord your God will send the hornet against them, until those who are left and hide themselves from you perish.
Deuteronomy 7:20
Chimpansy
Mar
14
2013
Just don’t call him that to his face.
Like a flower he comes forth and withers. He also flees like a shadow and does not remain.
Job 14:2
