Some Blog Site

As I mentioned last month, we got tickets to see Monsters University before it was released.

There were plenty of disclaimers on the ticket – first come, first serve, so you might not get admitted; if you are admitted, no recording devices of any kind are allowed; we can use your likeness to promote our film; etc.

The movie was to start at 7:00. Not knowing what to expect, We arrived at the theater around 6:15. I was glad we got there that early, because the line was out the door and past the end of the building. We were probably the 200th in line, which wasn’t really moving. And people were getting in line behind us too – it kept growing.

The Line

I was expecting a line (all those disclaimers about first-come first-served) and there was a line, so we got in it. But I just wanted to check that it was the right line. I glanced around and, sure enough, the people in front of us had the same Monsters University tickets that we did.

But there were more high school- and college-age kids than elementary school-age kids, which was not what I expected for this movie.

And then, after we had been standing in line for about 10 minutes, people dressed as zombies started walking up and down the line. Not a bunch – just a few. I thought that was really weird. Why would these people be doing that at a kids’ movie? I have never seen, nor do I want to see, any movies involving zombies. But I expect they could look depressed or sullen – these people just looked bored. And that made me think they were hired to be there.

Then someone a few families back mentioned “World War Z” and that pushed my suspiciousness level over the threshold. I told the kids to stay in line and I walked up to the front of the line, where there were some theater employees.
“What’s this line for?” I asked them.
“World War Z”
“Where’s the line for Monsters University?”
“Oh, that’s inside.”

I headed back to the kids, told them to follow me, and loudly announced that the line for Monsters was inside, so that other families wouldn’t be left high and dry by the unhelpful movie theater. We went inside, and the lady behind me in line and I exchange gripes about how the lines were handled: “they could at least have had some signs” and “those employees were just standing there doing nothing”. The employees didn’t need to tell everyone walking by what the arrangement was, but it would have helped a lot if they called out “World War Z here, Monsters University inside” every couple of minutes.

To be fair, I will say that the theater had signs on their doors saying which screenings were to use which doors. But the signs were not large (printed on a normal 8.5×11 sheet of paper) and most people saw the line and got in it without going up to the doors. Half the people never even saw the doors because where they parked was closer to the end of the line than to the doors, so they got in line without going near the theater entrance. Poor planning, poor logistics, and employees that lacked initiative.

In the Door

Once we got in the right line, we were behind only about a dozen families, and the Monsters line was moving faster than the World War Z line, so I settled down a bit. But I didn’t have my phone, so I had no idea what time it was, so I had no idea how close the movie was to starting. Strike two against the theater was that they had no clocks anywhere. Not on the walls, no current time display on the board that displays all the movie times. But we made it with plenty of time.

We got our tickets, 3D glasses, and headed for theater 9.

Before we got there, a lady stopped us and we had to get our photo taken in front of a MU backdrop. I assume it was for promotional reasons of some sort. They gave us a card with our ID# on it so we could go to some website and see/print our photo. I think I lost the card.

After the photo booth was the bouncer. He just asked a couple of questions, the main one being “Do you have any cell phones, cameras, or recording devices?” To which I answered “No”. I wasn’t carrying anything, so he didn’t have to search anything.

After the bouncer came the security guard. His job was mainly to wand people. I had to put my arms out while he checked for any metal. My car keys set off the wand. “What’s that?” he inquired, tapping my pocket with the wand. “My keys” “Okay, go ahead” and that was it. They didn’t ask my kids any questions or wand them, which has its pros and cons from security and a customer relations perspectives.

In the Theater

We got inside and the theater was only about a quarter full. Much of the middle was empty, so I directed my kids there. As we got closer, I saw why – the middle section, from about the 7th row through most of the way up was reserved for various groups. So we sat halfway up in the section on the far side.

The showing was sponsored by Radio Disney, so instead of the usual movie previews and such, they had a guy and assistant on a microphone, asking trivia questions and holding small contests. The prizes for winning were sticker packs. It held everyone’s attention well.

Then, after at about 15 minutes of that, the movie started. There were no movie previews, but there was a promotional spot for a certain TV station that promotes itself as being for families (or about families or something). Remember how in my I said there was nothing objectionable to worry about in the movie? Here is where I qualify that. The movie itself was fine – the worst part was having to endure the promos for sitcoms that I will not have my kids watch.

The movie started, we watched it, and we stayed through the credits because there is a bit after the credits. The bit was only about 15 seconds long, and it wasn’t worth sitting through all those credits. I think Pixar takes at least twice as many people to make a movie and most live-action films do.

In Summary

If you do go to a screening: get there slightly early, take seriously their warnings about recording devices, and check what the line is before you stand in it.

I set my phone screen to lock so that it won’t rotate. I know people put effort into the fancy sensors and software so the phone can have that feature, but it needs one more enhancement before I’ll use it.

Here is my use case – I’m lying on my side (on a couch, in bed, whatever) and I’m holding the phone. What should the phone do?

Here is the feature as the phone companies tout it (look! the phone screen knows which way is up!):

But here is how it works for me:

As you can see, when I lie on my side, the screen no longer matches me. Now I have to tilt my head awkwardly. Or disable screen rotation so that the phone doesn’t think it is smarter than I am (no, trust me – this is what you want, even though you don’t want it).

My proposal: Use the secondary camera match the screen orientation to the user, not to gravity

The new phones these days have cameras that can see the user. And they have facial recognition algorithms that should be able to know the angle of the person’s head. If the phone is tilted and the user’s head is tilted the same amount and direction, then don’t rotate the screen.

Bryan Logan, make it so.

P.S. – see about a NASA grant, because this technology would also apply to zero-gravity situations when the phone’s sensor can’t tell which way is up.

It was around this time a few years ago that I sent my first guest post submission to Jon Acuff. I titled it “Classifying Church Names”. Jon was positive in his email reply, but it never was published. After about 40 months of waiting for it appear on Stuff Christians Like, I am giving up on it and am publishing it here for you, dear reader. Enjoy!

When looking for a church, they key element to get right is the name. After all, a good name is to be more desired than great riches. But what makes a name good? As with many issues within Christianity, there are two camps on church names: descriptive or aesthetic.

The descriptive names include either the denomination or part of the doctrinal statement (or both). Some people say that the descriptive church names are bland and restrictive, but at least you know what you are getting when you go there.

And you know it’s a church. You don’t see businesses with traditional church names, like “Calvin Reformed Flower Shop” (specials on tulips!) or “Freewill Baptist Golf Course” (so that’s why the ball never goes where I want it to go…)

The aesthetic names include either a geologic feature or a direction (or both). But sometimes you need to do a little research before visiting the aesthetically-named church, in order to find out what kind of church it is and, more importantly, if it is a church. To help SCL readers hone their church-detecting skills, I present:

The Church Name Quiz

I took a sampling of names in my local area. For each name given below: what type of establishment is it?

1. Oak Pointe
A. Church
B. Subdivision
C. Restaurant
D. Mall

2. NorthRidge
A. Church
B. Subdivision
C. Restaurant
D. Mall

3. North Point
A. Church
B. Subdivision
C. Restaurant
D. Mall

4. The Father’s House
A. Church
B. Rehab center
C. Restaurant
D. Bookstore

5. Stillwater
A. Church
B. Subdivision
C. Restaurant
D. Mall

6. Woodside
A. Church
B. Subdivision
C. Restaurant
D. Mall

7. Brookside
A. Church
B. Subdivision
C. Restaurant
D. Mall

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Ricky assembled a team of bloggers to compete against the team of bloggers that Rob picked.

The official competition is at Rob’s site, but don’t forget to visit Ricky’s post about our team.

Here is my description of the teams, based on a current movie which applies quite nicely to this situation (for those unfamiliar with Monsters University, Roar Omega Roar is the fraternity for the assumed winners, Oozma Kappa is the fraternity for the underdogs).

Team Rob is Roar Omega Roar:

• Johnny Worthington = Rob.
  He’s the ringleader, so that’s an obvious choice.
• Javier Rios = Jon Acuff.
  He looks like he wants to punch fear in the face.
• Reggie Jacobs = Stephen Haggerty.
  He’s the hairiest of the crew.
• Chip Goff = Knox McCoy.
  He’s the second-hairiest of the crew.
• Chet Alexander = Carlos Whittaker.
  He has bigger arms than the other guys.
• Randall Boggs = Wes Molebash.
  Process of elimination.

Team Ricky is Oozma Kappa:

• Mike Wazowski = Ricky.
  He’s the ringleader, so that’s an obvious choice.
• Terri and Terry Perry = Bunmi Laditan.
  Is our team member Bunmi Laditan or Honest Toddler? Those two heads count as one for this team.
• Don Carlton = Daniel Carman.
  The names are close enough, I think.
• Art = Jan Moyer.
  Both fit in well in the kindergarten scene.
• Sully = Bryan Logan.
  The hairiest member of the team.
• Squishy = Some Guy.
  Process of elimination.
  No, seriously.

Go vote for OK! I mean, Team Ricky!

(And fellow team members, let me know if I assigned you the wrong person. Whom would you rather be?)

I went to Nevada earlier this year. It was my first time there, and also my first time to go to a certain restaurant, about which I have heard people rave. Maybe this blog post could inspire a new marketing campaign for them.

After my experience, I composed a song. Remember that it was the spring, so there was a slight wind and it was not too hot yet. We visited the restaurant after driving back from some attraction. Picture that it is late, after the sun went down.

Without further ado, here is the song. I hope you like it

On a dark desert highway, cool wind in my hair
Warm smell of carnitas, rising up through the air
Up ahead in the distance, I saw a shimmering light
My head grew heavy and my stomach thin, I had to stop for a bite
There it stood in the strip mall, it could my hunger quell
I was thinking to myself, “This could be heaven or something else”
Then she asked for my order and she showed me the way
There were voices behind the counter, I thought I heard them say

Welcome to the restaurant called Chipotle
Such a yummy place (such a yummy place)
Such a yummy space
Plenty of food at the restaurant called Chipotle
Any time of year
You can find it here

There are more verses to write. I don’t have them all down yet, but here are some of the phrases that should go into the song:

• her rice is cilantro-twisted
• some eat to remember, some eat to forget
• so I called to the cashier, please bring me my lime
• and she said, “we are all just customers here, of our own device.”

Now if only I could find a good tune to go with the words… Someone contact the Eagles and see if they can help.

And from what I hear from people near a Chipotle, once you start frequenting a Chipotle, you can’t stop. To put it another way, you can check out any time you want, but you’ll come back later.

Or something like that.

We celebrated the end of the school year with a trip to a waterpark. A nearby county park (Independence Lake) had spent a few million dollars on a glorified sprayground and we decided to see how it compared to a real waterpark. A real waterpark has areas to swim, or at least submerge one’s self. This place keeps prices down by not having any standing water – liability costs are lower and the “lifeguards” do not have to have any certification.

What exactly does Blue Heron Bay have? The best answer for that is a panoramic photo:

Now for the tour. First up, welcome to Blue Heron Bay.

Lots of spray stuff:

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Yesterday I took the older kids to see Monsters University. We got tickets to an advanced screening – excuse me, screaming – of the movie thanks to my wife’s friend.

When my wife called me and asked if I wanted to take the kids to see the movie, my first response was to check the usual review sites to see the appropriate age range and if there is any objectionable material.

The sites I like to check are Common Sense Media and Kids in Mind. Those two sites give reviews that are helpful to concerned parents. But… they review movies after they are out. Since this was June 18th and Monsters University doesn’t open until June 21st, all I got from one site was the synopsis provided by Pixar (and nothing from the other site).

So I had to go off movie critic reviews.

Those were not helpful. Mostly they lamented that, although not a bad movie, MU just didn’t live up to the expectations of previous Pixar releases. They gave the storyline and some other tidbits, but none of them told me the things I cared about:

• how scary are the monsters in this movie?
• any inappropriate material?
• it’s set at a college, so how is the frat party handled?

I’ll try to fill in those blanks so that parents who are wondering those things can have their answers for opening weekend.

The monsters (and settings) are slightly scarier than Monsters, Inc., and I did not see any inappropriate material.

My 9-year-old was eager to go and liked everything in the movie. My 7-year-old was not as eager to go, but he said he liked the movie. I was glad I did not take my 4-year-old, because it would have been too scary for him.

I’d recommend a minimum age of 6. That’s based on my family – your mileage may vary.
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